Are you looking forward to the holidays? No? If you’re healing a broken heart, the season of family gatherings and get-togethers can feel like something you need to survive rather than enjoy.
You may feel the only way to get through it all is is to hibernate under a fluffy blanket, but there are ways you can find happy moments even if you feel like the season shines a spotlight on your achy-breaky heart.
1. Isolate yourself in public.
Instead of wallowing in bed watching, “Once Upon A Time,” get up, put on some clean clothes, and take yourself out. Go to an Oscar-worthy movie (it’s the season for them), or sit with a cappuccino and your favorite book at a local coffee shop, or go check out a local art exhibit. Even if you don’t feel like being social, at least you’re mixing with other warm bodies (besides your Yorkie!).
2. Receive love and support from friends and family.
Many times we don’t talk about our breakup because we’re ashamed, embarrassed, or it’s just too painful to discuss. But talking about it can be the best therapy. When I was going through a painful divorce, I called up my brother and sister n’ law and asked if I could stay at their house for a couple of days. Just getting out of my own place with all the memories of my ex helped me break free of the cycle of hurt. So have a sleepover with a friend or family member and stay up late in your jammies, talking, drinking hot chocolate, and watching old Christmas movies. Accepting love and support from others goes a long way in healing a broken heart.
3. Keep your holiday traditions.
Don’t skip out on the holidays this year because you just can’t bring yourself to trim your tree. Host a decorating party with your friends and have everyone bring an ornament. Or host a cookie baking party and have everyone bring their favorite recipe. Or have vision board party and make visual collages of what you want in the New Year. Whatever you choose, you’ll be making your place light and jolly, instead of dark and gloomy.
4. Put yourself at the top of your holiday list.
Now that you don’t have to spend your hard-earned cash on the latest “man gear” gift, or on a Zip-line getaway trip for Mr. Heartbreaker, indulge in something you love. Buy yourself a day at the spa, plan a mini-getaway with your girlfriends (take a couple of days off in the middle of the week), or splurge on that red dress you’ve been eyeing. By taking care of yourself you are acknowledging your value and worth.
5. Stand under the mistletoe.
Holiday parties are probably the last place you want to drag your butt to, but they can be just what you need to get you out of your holiday slump. So accept that “Mix, Mingle & Jingle” party invite. If you’re uncomfortable going alone (I get it), bring a friend. Get your makeup done, put on your little black dress, and do some shameless flirting. And if you end up making out with a new cutie under the mistletoe, awesome!
The most important thing to remember is that your ex gave you a gift – the gift of YOU. So lavish your time and attention on your amazing self. Make your holiday wish list, knowing your possibilities are endless.
And the icing on your holiday cake is that you have the great opportunity to attract a much better man! So slip on those high heels, kick the past out the door, and step into a happier holiday!
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