Women haven't been waiting for a lab report to learn that
sexual sensation centered on the vagina is different from sensation
centered on the clitoris—or on the breasts, for that matter. But
apparently this is breaking news to sex researchers, who have only
recently confirmed these facts using high-tech brain scans. And if this
information comes as a surprise to your partner too, you'll be able to
change your sex life in the most satisfying ways imaginable.
This new research comes from Rutgers University, where
Barry R. Komisaruk, PhD, has been studying women's sexual response for 3
decades. He and his colleagues have now shown that not only does
stimulation of the clitoris, vagina, cervix, and nipples activate
distinct brain regions of the genital sensory zone of the cortex but
also that titillating one area affects other sexual brain sectors as
well.
These findings are especially important to long-standing
couples, who all too easily fall into sexual ruts, according to Nan
Wise, a certified sex therapist and PhD candidate in Dr. Komisaruk's
lab. The same old, same old sex routines don't work for women because
female sexuality is nuanced and complex—more like a symphony than a
cymbal clang. If your partner's approach to sex is one-note—exclusively
focused on your vagina, for example—he's shortchanging your pleasure
potential.
"Not every woman likes every type of touch, but there is
likely a cumulative effect," says Wise. "For most women, layering three
or four types of stimulation could lead to a better sexual experience
than enjoying one thing only." The result is that couples now have
myriad reasons to try new positions, modes of touch, and means of sexual
expression. Release your habits and inhibitions and let the fun begin.
Hot move #1: Show and tell In order to
defuse some of the tension that can creep into couple conversations
about less-than-satisfying sex, consider drawing your partner a
personalized pleasure map instead. Laura Berman, PhD, host of In the Bedroom with Dr. Laura Berman,
provides her clients with a black-and-white outline of a figure's front
and back on a sheet of paper. Circle the areas of the body where you'd
like your partner to lavish attention. Also key: Assign each zone a
number, which tells your partner what part of your body you want
stimulated first, second, third, and so on.
Hot move #2: Mix it up A
study from Indiana University underscores the importance of going
beyond the missionary position. Researchers surveyed almost 2,000 adults
and asked them about their most recent sexual experience. They found
that 81% of women who reported receiving oral sex reached orgasm,
compared with 66% for those who stuck to intercourse. Just like Dr.
Komisaruk and Wise at Rutgers, the Indiana researchers concluded that
the more varied the stimulation—oral sex being a particularly good
example—in a single sexual event, the more likely the women were to
reach orgasm.
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